Love in the Digital Age: How to Spot and Avoid Romance Scams

February, the month of love, is a time to celebrate connection, affection, and meaningful relationships. For many, that means online dating sites. In 2023, over 17 percent of the population of the United States were using online dating services, translating to almost 60 million users* across several generations.

Online dating sites may offer convenience, but remember, the search for love online can come with risks—particularly romance scams. These scams target your emotions, trust, and sometimes even your wallet. With a bit of knowledge and caution, you can protect yourself while still keeping your heart open to genuine connections.

Let’s explore how to identify a romance scam, what to watch out for, and how to safeguard your heart and finances while navigating online relationships.

What Are Romance Scams?

Romance scams typically start innocently, often on dating apps, social media, or even through unexpected messages. The person on the other end seems like a dream come true—charming, attentive, and interested in you. But behind the keyboard is a scammer, carefully crafting their words to gain your trust. Their goal? To exploit your emotions and eventually your money.

These scams often follow a familiar playbook:

1. Love at First Text: They quickly express strong feelings or claim you're their soulmate.
2. Too Good to Be True: Their profile might be overly polished with idealized photos and vague details.
3. Distant Lover: They often live far away, making it easy to avoid meeting in person.
4. A Sudden Crisis: They’ll share a story of hardship—a sick relative, a financial emergency, or a delayed paycheck—and ask for your help.

According to the FTC, Americans lost nearly $1.3 billion to romance scams in 2022. These scams aren’t just about money; they can leave victims feeling emotionally devastated.

Red Flags to Watch For

When you're looking for love online, it’s easy to want to believe the best in people. But trust your instincts and keep an eye out for these warning signs:

• They Move Fast: Scammers often try to establish a romantic relationship quickly. If someone declares their love after just a few messages, that’s a red flag.
• They Avoid Video Calls or In-Person Meetings: They may claim to have a poor internet connection or be too busy to meet, keeping the relationship entirely virtual.
• Their Stories Don’t Add Up: If their details seem inconsistent or too vague, question it.
• They Ask for Money: No matter how convincing the story, if they ask for money, gift cards, or account information, it’s a scam.

How to Protect Yourself

1. Do Your Homework: If something feels off, search for their photos or name online. Scammers often use stolen images or recycled profiles.
2. Set Boundaries: Be cautious about sharing personal details like your address, financial information, or sensitive photos.
3. Take Your Time: A real connection takes time to build. Don’t rush into anything that feels too intense too quickly.
4. Lean on Loved Ones: If you’re unsure about someone, talk to a trusted friend or family member. They may notice red flags you’ve missed.
5. Trust Your Gut: If something feels wrong, don’t ignore that feeling. It’s better to walk away than to risk being scammed.

What to Do If You’re Targeted

If you suspect you’re being scammed:

• Stop Communicating: Cease all contact immediately.
• Report It: File a complaint with the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov or your local law enforcement agency.
• Warn Others: Share your experience to help prevent others from falling into the same trap.

Real Love Is Worth the Wait

Romance scams can happen to anyone, but they don’t have to define your search for love. By staying informed, trusting your instincts, and being cautious with your heart, you can keep yourself safe and open to real connections.

Remember, love in the digital age is about finding someone who values you for who you are—not for what they can take from you. Genuine love doesn’t ask for money, lie to you, or hide in the shadows. This February, prioritize self-love and stay safe out there.

Real love is worth waiting for—and it’s always worth protecting.

* https://www.statista.com/topics/2158/online-dating/#topicOverview